For the past few months I have experienced the sensation of an absolute storm brewing around me. From losing loved ones, to nearly losing loved ones, to awaiting the loss of loved ones. Seeing people struggle to find their footing in this rocky economy. Watching people leave their homes in search of something that will keep them afloat. An election that didn't go the way I had hoped. Seeing people I love make choices that I wish they would not.
I feel so blessed to say that I have a home. A vehicle. A husband who is well and who has work. Two amazing little boys who aside from pesky viruses here and there, are healthy and strong.
Of course the things going on around me have an affect on me. Many of them have largely impacted my life.
Somehow though, in the midst of it all, I find peace. In the times when I think that if anything else happens I am going to fall apart, there is a stillness that rejuvenates and calms me.
I know what that peace is and I know where it comes from. I cannot say how grateful I am for it.
Some days I find myself wondering if the storm will subside or if it will sweep through my own home before blazing on to another. And then there it is again. The peace.
It is soft and pleasant amidst the chaos surrounding me. It is most welcome. I imagine it is something like being in the eye of the storm. Where it is unnaturally still despite the calamity that threatens it's perimeter.
A familiar hymn, a favorite, drifts in like a lullaby.
Be still, my soul
Thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as he has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul
The waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while he dwelt below.
I cannot say when the storm will pass. I cannot say what more will come in these turbulent times. I just pray that the peace will continue to visit me. That I will be still.