Thursday, March 26, 2009

{thank goodness for laughter}

i would really like to thank whomever of my predecessors it was that contributed to my sense of humor. that was my saving grace today.

truly.

{by the way NO THANK YOU to the person responsible for my nasty know-it-all gene.}

allow me to set the stage.

standing at the pharmacy counter waiting for what must be the millionth prescription for my not-even-two-year-old... "take one dose every twenty-four hours....no milk...no juices....now this may cause diarrhea..."

puh-lease. i got this. feeling like a seasoned pro in the antibiotic arena, i pay and leave.

{this particular time, the prescription was picked up by my father-in-law, but now you get the idea.}

now here is where i made the big mistake. never before have i had a "big boy in training" aka: potty trainer, on an antibiotic. if you ever find yourself in this particular situation you may want to rethink the underwear when you're dressing your darling child.

no really. i'm serious.

have you ever set out on a hunt for "the remains of whatever that is running down his leg"? pray you never have to. it isn't pleasant.

after a good ten minutes of searching...which i never would have thought was possible, what with the serious stink factor...the mess was located. the cleaning up bit was enough to make a grown man cry. scratch that. i actually don't know that a grown man would have even made it that far.

in short, it was the most grotesque of all my motherly duties ever performed.

honest to goodness truth, my trusty little green machine almost went straight to bissell heaven when the chore was over. i could hardly stand the thought of cleaning him out too. mr. green can thank the economy for the fact that he is now sparkling clean and on a shelf in the garage.

somehow i managed to chuckle throughout a portion of this experience. it was that or sit there and cry and wait for the mess to clean itself up.

thank goodness for laughter. even if it isn't always entirely sane.

and now seriously let me repeat...
antibiotic {plus} potty-training child {equals} DIAPER-and i'm even thinking you might want to duct tape that baby on.

for reals.

7 comments:

Jennifer said...

Ashlee, that is much funnier when it is not your child. It's nice to read it on another blog and not your own. But, I understand the laughter part. Sometimes it's the only way to keep sane. :)

THE CAVEY CLAN said...

Let me tell you, they don't mix with a FULLY potty trained child. I had the "pleasant" experience the other night and had to clean carpets at 2 am just to ease my mind a bit! I can HONESTLY say I feel ya on that one! And sorry it happened to you too:)!

Mandi said...

I just have to tell you Ashley that there is no blog that I love to read more than yours. You have the most amazingly beautiful way with words and I always feel sad when I have finished reading your posts because they are just so nice. It makes me feel sad that I live here and that you live there and I don't know you nearly as well as I would like. I hope that you know that I love you.

{nicole coombs} said...

Just took a break from packing and what do I choose to do with my time? Eat and Read YOUR Blog! Cause I love too it makes me feel close to you haha, Anyway sorry about the mess :( poor little man. And might I add only YOU can make reading a story about messy poop enjoyable :) You are a stupendous--if thats even a word-- writer
Love ya-

Mary said...

Ahh, the adventures of motherhood...

Maggie May said...

I came here through Cjane, Hi! Your blog is lovely and sweet. I have a tip (as a mom of three) for ya about antibiotics: give your children children's probiotics and they will have way less problems with the diaper end of things :)

I love your header!

somebody said...

酒店經紀人,菲梵酒店經紀,酒店經紀,禮服酒店上班,酒店小姐,便服酒店經紀,酒店打工,酒店寒假打工,酒店經紀,酒店經紀,專業酒店經紀,合法酒店經紀,酒店暑假打工,酒店兼職,便服酒店工作,酒店打工經紀,制服酒店經紀,專業酒店經紀,合法酒店經紀,酒店暑假打工,酒店兼職,便服酒店工作,酒店打工,酒店經紀,制服酒店經紀,酒店經紀